Over the past couple of weeks, I have had two recurring questions proposed to me; 1.) "What happened to your face?" and 2.) "So are you dating anyone?" Since I usually answer, "You should see the other guy," to the first question, let's move on to the second.
No.
Brief? Yes. But I'm not here to make a pity party out of my single status. I'm writing this because we all have been in this place, and it's just a part of us maturing and coming to understand who we are as people...but I bet some people just say that to convince themselves that they won't die alone and unloved...
I have other single friends. I also have friends that are married, dating, celibate, promiscuous, gay, straight, and sometimes like group activities. For the most part, they're pretty happy with their current relationship status, and I'm sure there are a few who could be happier, but regardless of their level of content, everyone is still slowly advancing in the stages of discovering one's self. Some people need to find a yin to realize that they are the yang, while some people need to go backpacking across Europe, and some people define themselves by their work and what they accomplish in life. These are just examples of ways people continue to develop an understanding of what they have to offer the Universe and themselves.
Let's be honest, you have friends that are married, and sometimes you find yourself thinking, "Married? Already? Well, I guess their lives are over." Of course when people get married, their lives change; I don't know if I would say they're "over" by any means, though. They've just found a different route on their way to discovering themselves. Like I inferred before, some individuals need to be a part of a whole to realize the role they play in the Universe. Like a cog that says, "What up? I'm a cog...what the fuck do I do?" can't find out that answer until its a part of something; "What up? I'm a cog. Yea, I make this clock work. What's it to you?" Our reactions of abhorrence towards our friends who get married is based partially on jealousy. It's a subconscious jealousy, but a jealousy nonetheless. We are secretly just mad that they may be further down the path of self discovery than we are. We should not be angry. It's entirely possible that we may have more to discover in life before we can define ourselves further with our love, and that could be because our destiny is more complex than those already partnered up in holy matrimony or civil union.
I'm not implying the existence of people who marry early in life is small, simple, and insignificant. No single human being has a small existence in this World. Every life affects every other life, which affects more lives, and so on and so forth. Even if I consider you a douchebag or a "spacewaster," I'm confident in the fact that at some point in your life you made an impression on somebody that was for the benefit of society. I'm simply stating we all have specific obstacles to overcome at specific and different points in our timeline that are organized randomly, at best. And with each obstacle tackled, we become more and more self-knowledgeable and get closer to the final realization that sums up our life.
I consider myself to currently be in a stage of laissez-fair existence. My goal isn't to be life's doormat or anything, but I do like to just let things happen, particularly, when it comes to a "love life." I think of myself as a somewhat ambitious person. I don't have the attitude of, "I'll slit anyone's throat who gets in the way of me and my dreams," but I do have drive and a passion for what I do. In the past, my romantic relationships have never come out of me looking for someone or hoping that the right girl would walk by me in the hallway. I've always become involved with someone just by chance. You can't really expect stuff like this to happen whenever you wish, but just know that moments will come where you'll meet someone who will become very special to you.
Okay. So about five hours have passed since I typed that last sentence. Now that I'm full of hoppy, malty goodness courtesy of the Flying Saucer, I'm ready to jot down some final thoughts. I am one of those people that is not actively searching for love. I feel my best bet at finding myself and discovering what I have to offer the rest of the World is to sail solo for a while until I find what the next step of my life is. I know some people that are so fixated on becoming a part of a couple and are constantly on the search for love, and pushing life like that is not the answer. Life is to be enjoyed, and if you spend too much time searching for something you want, you'll miss out on what life is giving you.
